STUDY FINDS MORE THAN 17,000 CHILDREN INJURED EACH YEAR WHEN TVS STOP ROTTING THEIR BRAINS LONG ENOUGH TO FALL ON THEM
(THE GIST) — According to a new study by the American Academy of Pediatrics, each year more than 17,000 children are treated in emergency rooms for injuries that occur when the TVs they are watching a barrage of their favorite insipid programming on stop impairing their linguistic and social development long enough to tip over and hurt their bodies too.
Prompted by a spate of TV-related deaths in the Chicago area, where the new ABC show Mind Games, starring Christian Slater and Steve Zahn as brothers where one has bipolar disorder and the other is a con artist and they run a detective agency or something is based, the study found that close to 400,000 children were rushed to hospital emergency rooms from 1990 to 2011 with injuries that included lacerations, concussions, and even traumatic brain injuries. That’s a TV falling on a child’s head every 45 minutes!
Children ages 5 and younger were the most vulnerable to the danger from the falling TVs, as well as from the manipulative junk food commercials likely to be projected on the screens as they hurtle towards their skulls.
The study made no value judgment whether sustaining a serious injury was or was not preferable to sitting through the final act of Duck Dynasty.
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